Carla Van Raay's Story
with Kindness and Resilience
I was seven years a member of a metaphysical community I still regard as my spiritual family, when I began to have inklings that it was time for me to move out of home, so to speak, and explore further, without knowing where to look. This was a traumatic thought, since here I had found a certain sense of belonging that is still precious to me. I had not experienced ‘belonging’ for the longest time! I had been a loner for most of my life.
It was at this critical time that I became aware of the 7 Keys of Kindness and Resilience Course, and my heart knew immediately that I was called to do this. I had met Wendy Campbell years before, and knew of her sterling qualities and of the extraordinary kindness she lived in her own life. Three more months elapsed before the goodbye that would see me lose communication with my erstwhile ‘family.’ In the new year of 2015, I began the Keys of Kindness and Resilience Course.
That was six years ago. The impact the Course and the person at its helm, Wendy Campbell, was far more than a description of the Keys within the course would reveal. I came to myself in a new way. Authenticity is very difficult to achieve for most of us, since we get normalised from an early age to the feeling of having to behave in a way we believe is acceptable, or else be rejected. I can’t say that I achieved authenticity within the timespan of that one year, but that the foundations of it were laid down for further growth, since I had found a growth in inner strength.
Kindness to myself was a foreign idea to me for the longest time, having been brought up in a strict Catholic family, endured abuse of different kinds and chose to live the life first of a nun in an order with strict rules, then as a prostitute. These kinds of decisions are not based on kindness to self. I managed more kindness to my clients as a sex worker than to myself! The reverberations of the Kindness and Resilience Course have stayed with me to gradually build more kindness in my life.
The strangest Key of the Seven Keys was the Key ‘Making Friends with Time.’ This was also the hardest to adopt since I could not recognise how this related to kindness or to resilience, but that was simply my immaturity and lack of really feeling into this key. I was and am not extremely disciplined, but recognise now that taking care of myself does indeed mean regulating my use of time inspirationally and practically. This naturally gives me more strength to achieve.
Kindness to the planet and to all its inhabitants, including animals, and respect for the planet’s resources, using them sustainably, came as no surprise to me. This is where the Course was particularly useful to businesses, to help them examine how their operations affected the planet and so make kinder decisions for the planet. Kindness and Resilience in the workplace would only bring benefit to an organisation’s strength, and the welfare of their staff members and workforce.
I would say that here is the potential to transform a humdrum personal life or a stagnant organisation into fresh and joyful living.
As for myself, I have learnt to forgive. Forgiveness is now my thing. I am writing new pieces, and revisiting older pieces with this focus in mind. I want to share the power of forgiveness with my brothers and sisters, since what we teach, we always learn better ourselves. Forgiveness demands Resilience and Kindness and fosters both! It is the ultimate gift that we can only share by giving it to ourselves first. Visit my website here:
Carla Van Raay